fuckyeahlaughters: “please grab your homework on your way out of class”
satans-nipples: i put headphones in 20 minutes ago and forgot to play music: a novel by me
greydelisle: “I can make your bed, Rock.” - Dwayne Johnson’s housekeeper
bondoge: do u ever listen to a song and u like forget ur listening to it and when it’s almost over ur just like what
i can’t imagine someone ever looking at me and getting butterflies that just doesn’t happen
sunsetorangepeeta: do you ever wonder if anyone has a crush on you and then laugh at yourself because ew who would have a crush on you
meladoodle: *doctor delivers baby* yes that’ll be $8 for shipping and handling
stop being cute if you’re not gonna date me wtf
thorinsexenshield: tea-inthetardis: bugsinricepudding: i’m looking for a romantic way to say i hope you think about me when you masturbate sometimes In the deepest, calmest hours of the night when you have naught but your own company, I hope my image fills you with bliss. Wow.
People who tag themselves in their profile...
lolsofunny: Thank you. i was wondering who that person was.
rnackenzie: remember when my cat helped make pizza
thefabulousdangergays: mrcraabs: do you really love your parents? I bet you cant name 4 of their albums “get dressed it’s 4pm” “you’ve been sat at that computer all day” “tidy your god-damn room” and who can forget their biggest seller “don’t give me that attitude”
mom : why are there finger prints on the TV screen ?
mom : you've been stroking the actors' faces again, haven't you ?
Trying to impress people when you dance
wowfunniestposts: Expectations: Reality: Featured on Wow Funniest Posts
wankmeatsix: nothing worse than your social anxiety getting mistaken for rudeness
Me at 10 PM: fuck man i'm so tired
Me at 4 AM: i must WRITE A NOVEL
cnnbreaking: that walk when you get called out of class to leave early
double-takee: read this if you think im hot
Parents: you can be anything you want
Parents: no not that
stout-shako: when u try to tell ur parents about a problem but they end up yelling at u
foxnewsofficial: walk into the club like “what’s the wifi password”
magicalmischief: When a teacher sends you to take something to another room
overshootingtheatmosphere: At any given time, the urge to sing “The lion sleeps tonight” is just a whim away a whim away, a whim away, a whim away…
I hate it when you're expecting a phone call and...
me: hush little laptop dont you cry mommas gonna find you some more wifi
cnnbreaking: girls that call their boyfriends daddy
prrb: lets play a game called “where the fuck is the next button in this theme”
1mew: my love is like a candle, if you forget me, i will burn your fucking house down
deeeeeeeeeeeeetitsaaaaaaaaaaaaan: you havent experienced awkward until you try to tickle someone who isn’t ticklish
cornsaladsurprise: barbietalkingtownhouse: somebody photoshop a nose piercing on one of my pictures i wanna see what i look like :*
girls at the beach: giggles as they jump over the small waves while squealing cutely
me at the beach: falls face first into a 2 metre wave which i get out of covered in sand and choking on seaweed